The State of New Jersey-Drums

• 5000 B.C. - The Lenni Lenape Indians shared the state with other tribes, such as the Powhatan-Renape. They seem to have lived in relative harmony with the land.
• 1524 A.D.- New Jersey is discovered by a European, and so begins to exist in the official sense. Giovanni da Verrazano would go on to donate his name to a bridge into New York.
• 1609 - Henry Hudson establishes a Dutch colony, New Netherland, bringing many white men of European descent to the area. Billboards everywhere are re-written to appeal to the new key demographic.
• 1746 - In an effort to further the fortunes of white men of European decent, Princeton University is founded.
• 1787 - On December 12, New Jersey becomes the third state to join the union by ratifying the U.S. Constitution. Other states are promised two free drum lessons if they ratify within twenty-four hours.
• 1788 - The burgeoning duties of statehood force New Jersey to set aside the drums in order to concentrate on free market capitalism.
• 1877 - Thomas Edison invents the phonograph while living in Menlo Park, NJ.
• 1978 - Gambling is legalized in Atlantic City.
• 1989 - After a two century + 45 day hiatus, New Jersey begins playing drums again.
• 1992 - While competing in Barcelona New Jersey suffers a critical wrist injury mid-routine, but is able to finish in spite of all odds and take home the gold. Kerry Strug pulls the same trick 4 years later, gets all the fame.
• 2001 - After the World Trade Towers collapse right next door, New Jersey takes a brief vacation in the Azores, meets Evans and Kimmel, who are currently on the run from racial profiling.
• 2003 - North Jersey is the car theft capital of the world, with more cars stolen in Newark then any other city.
• 2004 - New Jersey signs a three year contract to play drums for Florrid Porpise with Evans and Kimmel.

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